Reminiscing about the past, and how very much I don't miss it

Me: I'm so glad I don't have to fight people in front of a giant crowd anymore.

Patrick: That's not something you hear all the time. "Man, I'm glad I don't have to fight for my life in deathmatches anymore. That was stressful."

Me: Well, it wasn't really the fear of death. I just didn't want to suck. I never did get kicked in the head, but it was stressful.

Patrick: You could've had your nose broken! Your cute button nose! Didn't he (my ex-husband) care about that? Did he want you to get your face smashed in?

Me: Well, I don't think he WANTED me to, exactly. But he knew it was one of the risks. Fortunately I paid attention during training. Mostly he thought it was impressive to have a wife who was in martial arts. He was always very concerned with appearances. Anything that made him look cooler.

Patrick: He just wanted to say that he had a scientist wife who was also a martial artist and hot? -pause- Actually, I guess I've described you that way, too...

Me: Uh huh.