FFF 10-7 - Coffee Talk

78-208
Enthusiastically

 Coffee Talk:  ‘So there I was, a young girl, a virgin mind you, in the middle of New York City, the fucking Big Apple itself and not a penny to my name.  Well, not quite penniless, I had a few Traveler’s Checks with me, I mean really, who leaves home without them, but anyway I was almost penniless, had no where to stay.  I had my brother’s ratty army backpack with a few pair of clean underwear, 2 pairs of pants, maybe four shirts, maybe five, anyway, I have no change to call anyone, right, so I go into this little electronics shop, you know the kind, right? Like the ones near Time Square that have a million “Big Sale” signs in the front windows, the cheap starburst kinds with the garish orange, oh God how I hare orange always did.  Where was I? That’s right, Time’s Square, New York, the mother-fucking Big Apple itself, when I find myself in this little shop that sold the cheapest stereos and cameras known to man and the guy behind the counter won’t cash my Traveler’s Check so I can make a phone call.  “Fuck you” he says, “Fuck YOU!” I says, and I’m about to leave when this Adonis, this drop-dead-panties-wet-get-me-to-the-church-on-time Adonis walks out and tells his dad to call down.  Well! He won’t break my $20-mother-Effing check either, but he tells me he’ll do me one better.  He takes me up stairs to his apartment, lets me use his phone to call Mary, not Aunt Mary, but the other Mary, Belinda’s Mary, not Tony’s Mary, and then he spins me around, kisses me, strips me naked, fucks the living shit out of me. ME!  Of all people!  A virgin one minute and a New York slut the next.  He pulls me to his lap and slides that monster cock of his deep inside and goes at it.  I respond, who knew? Right, me, yeah, who knew I’d spread my virgin thighs so enthusiastically, but there I was, straddling this Adonis, this Greek God, right here.”  She pats the couch affectionately, “This is where you were conceived.”  She sighs as the memory fades, “Does that answer your question?” 
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Audition:

What do you think?

Oh fuck.

Is that good?

Shut up

 I won’t say a word; he’s cute though, right?

Yea, he’s…..ooooohhhhhh

What?

He’s FINE, yes, oh fuck,

OK, I mean he’s cute, not like that last guy, Ick, did you see his foreskin?

SHUT UP!

Is he worth $500?  Not to be cheaps…

Aaaaaannnnghhhh

Are you OK?

OH FUCK!!

It’s your sister’s bachelorette party. I have no idea how to pick a stripper.

He’ll do just fine.

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 The Couch:
Scene:  Therapist’s office with couch.  Man and woman in coitus, 2^nd woman adjacent.

Wife:                     I know the theory sexual surrogacy, that doesn’t mean I like it.

Doctor:                 Why does it bother you? 

Wife:                     WTF Why?  Because he’s fucking you right in front of me.

Doctor:                 That bothers you?

Wife:                     Yes, it bothers me. 

Doctor:                 You wanted him to be a better lover.

Wife:                     But with me, not you.

Doctor:                 He can’t get hard with you, isn’t that what brought you in?

Wife:                     I thought you were just going to give him a pill or something

Doctor:                 I’m a holistic healer.

Wife:                     What are you doing now?

Doctor:                 I’m showing him how to stimulate my clit.

                                Do you see how wet that makes me George?

Husband:             Gasping, uh-huh, yeah.

Wife:                     Now he’s going to want to do that to me?

Doctor:                 You job is to please him, and him you.  I think he’s very competent.

Wife:                     What does that mean?  Are you blaming this on me?

Doctor:                 All I know is that I’ve cum twice while we’ve been talking.

Wife:                     Oh great.  Has he cum yet?

Doctor:                 Not yet, he’s hard as a rock.

Wife:                     Well wrap this up, insurance only pays for an hour….
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OK, the formatting is not working and I am way over the work limit on #1, and I'm out of time to write a commentary, but I thought the picture was fun and sexy and had lost of potential, I hope I did it justice.  The one thing I do know is that this woman just would not shut up....  :-)

Have a wonderful Friday, find a reason to laugh, and go check out Panser’s site for a list of others who joined in today.